Still, Still, Still! A Christmas to Remember
by sammygirl1963
Summary: Bobby invites the boys to spend Christmas at Singer Salvage. Dean is in no mood to celebrate. What happens when Sam is critically injured and the doctor's don't give him much hope? Will the brother's get a Christmas Miracle? Limp/Sam, Angry/Angsty Dean
1. Chapter 1

**Still, Still, Still --A Christmas to Remember**

**Disclaimer: **Still don't own them and still not making a profit. I also don't own the words to the Christmas song Still, Still, Still!

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It was a cold December morning in the town of Monroe Oregon. Sixteen inches of pristine white snow lay on the ground having fallen quietly overnight. The area looked like a scenic picture postcard complete with snow laden evergreen trees interspersed throughout the old western style town that was ablaze with Christmas decorations alluding to the upcoming holiday. Inside the Monroe Inn slept two brothers who had stopped to spend the night after having just finished a hunt for a bearwalker in Mountain Air Park. On one bed, the oldest brother was peacefully sleeping with his right hand tucked under his pillow holding onto the shaft of his favorite hunting knife wearing nothing but a pair of navy blue boxers. In the other bed, the youngest slept wearing a pair of jogging pants and a light green t-shirt. He was sleeping fitfully as horrid dreams assaulted his restless mind. He curled up into a fetal position and whimpered softly before relaxing into sleep once again.

Dean was awakened early as daylight streamed through a crack in the closed drapes and shone on his face. He turned his head to see Sam still asleep in the other bed with the disheveled blankets wrapped around his legs indicating that he had had a restless night. Sammy hadn't been sleeping too well since their father had died approximately two months before and if Dean were honest, he spent quite a few restless nights himself. Knowing that he wouldn't be able to go back to sleep, Dean climbed out of the bed quietly and grabbed some clean clothing from his duffle bag. He took a quick shower and dressed in warm clothing so that he could go grab them some breakfast before hitting the road later today. After dressing in blue jeans, an AC?DC t-shirt and a long sleeved denim shirt, he pulled on his leather jacket and wrote Sam a quick note telling him where he would be.

Walking outside, he shivered from the cold and grumbled at the sight of all the Christmas decorations that were completely strewn about the town. He was in no damned mood to celebrate he and wished people would quit rubbing the season in his face. To make matters even worse, his beloved Impala was covered in snow and he would have to scrap it off before he could leave to find a decent place for breakfast. Thank goodness he had thought ahead and put snow tires on the car knowing that they would come in handy during the winter months. Opening the drivers side door, he slid in and started the car before turning on the defroster so it could help to melt any ice on the windows after he had scraped the snow away. After a few minutes, he climbed into the now warm car and drove off carefully down the road in search of someplace serving breakfast.

"Sammy you better be damned glad I'm doing this" Dean mumbled to himself as he fought the wheel to keep the Impala from sliding on the black ice into a snow bank. If he had known the roads were going to be so damned bad, he would have just grabbed a stale danish or two from the continental breakfast being offered by the Inn. As the roads became worse, Dean was forced to slow down to what he felt like was a snail's pace at only thirty five miles per hour. "Jeez, is the whole frickin world against me?" he questioned as he thumped his hand on the steering wheel in anger.

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"_Damn it, who the hell could be calling at this time of the morning?" _Sam wondered as he heard the sound of the Back in Black ring tone signifying an incoming call. Dean had added the ring tone to his phone a few days ago after he had heard the tune of Silent Night playing one too many times from people calling. He pushed himself up from a lying position and flung his legs off of the side of the bed as he groggily reached out to pick up the phone, noticing for the first time that Dean was no longer in the room.

"Yeah, who's this?" Sam mumbled half asleep as he flipped open his cell phone.

"Hey Sam, it's Bobby. Did I wake ya kiddo?"

"Uh yeah, S'okay. Is something wrong Bobby?" Sam inquired as he reached out to pick up the note he now saw laying on the dresser with Dean's handwriting on it informing him that he went for breakfast.

"Nah, everything's fine. Listen Sam, I was hoping that you and Dean could come by for a few days and spend Christmas here with me, maybe drink a little eggnog and talk of times past." Bobby didn't like the idea of the boys being on their own this holiday season since the pain of losing their dad was still so raw in their minds.

"I don't know Bobby. Dean hasn't been in the best of moods lately and he is acting like a scrooge. Maybe it would be better if we just let this Christmas quietly slip by without any fanfare on our parts."

"Aw, come on Sammy, you wouldn't want to leave an old man to his lonesome on Christmas would ya boy?" Bobby retorted eager to change Sam's mind.

"What old man are you talking about Bobby? "Can't be you we're talking about cause you still got lots of life in ya man!" Sam grinned.

"Something must have knocked you in the head boy if you're thinking that. Anyway, I think it would be good for you boys to come by the salvage yard. I don't like the thoughts of you being out there by yourself, especially at this time of year. Just promise me you'll try Sam. You don't have to tell Dean anything, just get him here and I'll take all the blame for springing Christmas on him." Bobby prodded.

"I'll see what I can do Bobby, but I'm not promising anything." Sam informed the hunter who was a father figure to them now.

"Thanks Sam, hey, why don't you just tell him I need help on a hunt or something. That should catch his interest and make him more willing to visit."

"Okay Bobby, will do. You just better be prepared for one pissed off Winchester when Dean finds out we swindled him into coming" Sam said knowing that Dean wouldn't react well to finding out what they had done.

"Don't sweat it tiger, I've dealt with you dad when he was pissed off more times than I care to remember, Dean will be a piece of cake. I'll see you boys soon Sam."

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By the time Dean made it back to the motel room, the only thing still hot was his temper. He had spent more than thirty minutes at the diner waiting on their food because the damned waitress had forgotten to turn in his order and she still had the nerve to wish him a Merry Christmas. And then to top things off, on the way back to the motel he had gotten a flat and had to change it in the freezing snow. By the time he had finished, his hands were freezing and his nose was dripping disgusting snot. He flung the door open with more force than necessary causing it to bang against the wall. "If one more person wishes me a Merry Christmas, I'm going to punch their damned lights out" Dean gritted as he walked into the room to deposit the food in front of Sammy who was sitting at the table researching on his laptop.

"Here's you're breakfast and I don't want to hear one damned word about it being cold" Dean growled as he pulled the sausage and egg burritos out of the brown paper sack. He quickly unwrapped his burrito, took one bite out of it and threw it in the trash. "Damn it, they can't even make a freaking burrito in this town without having gooey eggs."

"What is with you dude?" Sam asked as he watched his ill tempered brother slam dunk his breakfast into the small motel trash can.

"Nothin' I'm just tired of all the holiday cheer that this town is trying to force down our throats. Get your bags packed Sam, we're getting the hell out of here."

"O---kay" Sam said with a slow drawl as he trashed his own breakfast. The eggs were definitely undercooked and he didn't want to get food poisoning. He quickly shut down the computer and then started stuffing his things into his duffle bag. "Oh, by the way Dean, Bobby called and he wants us to come to his…"

"Forget it Sammy. We're not going to Bobby's to celebrate the holiday. All I want to do is find some out of the way place, drink myself into a blissful oblivion and sleep Christmas day away." Dean said as he glared at his baby brother daring Sam to challenge him.

"Who said anything about celebrating?" Sam asked as he pointedly turned away from Dean to get his things out of the motel bathroom, sure that his face would be a dead giveaway as to what he and Bobby had planned. "Bobby asked for our help with an angry spirit that has been terrorizing a young couple not too far from where he lives. Bobby wants to vanquish the spirit before they get back from her folks place."

"Sounds good, but you better not be lying to me Sammy" Dean warned him as he finished packing up his own things. It would be just like Sam and Bobby to plan something behind his back, when they knew damned well how he felt right now.

"Jeez Dean, would you stop acting like a damn Grinch" Sam mumbled as he walked out of the bathroom only for Dean to grab him by the shirt and slam him up against the wall. "What the hell dude?"

"I've had it with your attitude the past few weeks Sam. Do you even give a shit that dad died? Because you're sure not acting like it little brother" Dean spat out contemptuously.

"That's not fair Dean and you know it" Sam said as he forcefully shoved his brother away from him, his eyes shining with tears. "I loved dad just as much as you did and it hurts like hell that he's not here with us right now. And I'm sorry that the last thing I did was try to pick a fight with him and I'll never forgive myself for it. I'm just tired of…just forget it" Sam uttered before brushing past Dean with his bag and walking out the door. He stomped over to the Impala and threw his duffle bag into the open trunk before climbing into the passenger side of the sleek black muscle car.

Dean felt guilty as he watched his brother walk away. He knew he shouldn't have said the things he did, but he was just so damned tired and he let his anger get away from him. He followed Sam out to the car and closed the trunk after putting his own duffle bag into it. He opened his door and slid into the car before looking over at Sam who now had his attention focused out the side passenger window.

"Sammy, I didn't mean…" he started to say but was cut off by his little brother.

"Forget it Dean" Sam voiced shakily as he continued to stare out the window not willing to forgive his brother just yet.

**TBC**_** Should I continue?**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Still, Still, Still --A Christmas to Remember Ch. 2**_

_**Disclaimer: **__Still don't own them and still not making a profit. I also don't own the words to the Christmas song Still, Still, Still!_

_**Author's Note: **__This story is dedicated to Criminally Charmed who provided the plot bunny for it. You know I love ya girl! This story will move at a quicker pace than usual as I want to have it finished by Christmas day. _

_**A.N. 2 **__Wow, I was overwhelmed by all the wonderful support for this story, thank you. And a big thanks to all the anonymous reviewers also._

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_**Previously: **__"Forget it Dean" Sam voiced shakily as he continued to stare out the window not willing to forgive his brother just yet._

Dean was going crazy! They had been on the road for three hours now and Sammy had still not spoken to him, let alone looked at him. Sam had pillowed his head on his right arm approximately an hour ago but it was obvious he wasn't sleeping, only staring ahead into the great white expanse of snow covered land in front of them. As he took another furtive glance at his baby brother, Dean felt guilty knowing that he was the one who had put Sam into such a somber mood. He shouldn't have accused Sammy of not caring about their father's death, but it was too late to take the words back now. He would just have to suck it up and apologize or the ten hour ride to Bobby's was going to be an extremely long one.

"Hey Sammy, how about we stop in the next town and get a burger to eat, what do you think?" Dean asked. He was disappointed that instead of answering, Sam just shrugged his shoulders as if it didn't matter.

"Come on dude, you can't stay mad at me forever. You know that I sometimes let my anger get the better of me. I swear Sammy that I never meant to hurt you."

Sam sighed loudly and then turned his head to look out the passenger window. He was still hurting from the grossly unfair words that Dean had said to him in the motel and it brought back painful memories of him saying such hateful words to their dad before he died. Now his dad would never know just how much he loved him and how sorry he was for all the times he fought with him. He knew his dad did the best he could, but now it was too late to tell him that. Sam allowed the tears to trail silently down his face wishing that he could have just one more day with his father.

"Sammy come on, I didn't mean what I said. Please just look at me dude" Dean pleaded needing to make amends with his little brother. When he still got no reply, Dean pulled the Impala over to the side of the road and switched off the engine.

"We're going to sit right here kiddo until you talk to me even if it takes all night long. I know I hurt you and I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am for that. I know you loved dad and that you're hurting just as much as I am if not more. So you just let me know when you're ready to talk dude."

Knowing that Dean was just stubborn enough to what he said, Sam turned around to face his brother with the tear streaks fresh on his face. "You have no idea how much you hurt me with your words Dean. Don't you know I feel guilty as hell for the way that dad died. Hell, he died thinking that I hate him when that couldn't have been more far from the truth. So to answer your question, yeah, I do give a shit that he died. Are you happy now?"

"No, I'm not. You know that I never could stand you being mad at me bitch, forgive me?" Dean asked with imploring eyes.

"Jerk" Sam replied swiping the tears from his face. Even though he was still hurting, it felt good to get those words off his chest.

Dean smiled and reached over to ruffle Sam's curly chesnut hair before starting up the car and pulling back out onto the highway. Things weren't perfect between the two of them, but at least they were talking once again. Feeling relaxed now, he drove for another hour before pulling off of Interstate 25 in Sundance Wyoming. His girl was in need of a refueling and he could use some food himself.

After stopping at the local Gas-N-Go, he drove down the road to the Crook County Saloon which the store clerk had recommended as the best place to eat in town. The restaurant was housed in a rustic looking building with swinging gates at the front door. The restaurant resembled the old type saloons that were found in the old western movies with the polished wooden bar up front and a baby grand piano off to the side with a man playing western tunes. Dean and Sam walked up to the bar and took a seat as they waited for the waitress to come over and take their orders.

"What will it be boys?" Alison asked with a sweet smile as she pulled a pen and pad from the front pocket of her saloon girl outfit.

"I'll have a medium rare steak with baked potato and a side of onion rings for me" Dean replied as he appraised the busty waitress in front of him. She stood about five foot seven with curly blonde hair and had a sway when she walked that would make an angel sit up and take notice.

"And what can I get for you sir?" Alison asked as she looked at Sammy with adoring eyes. She loved tall brunettes with rugged builds and this man was just her type. And the dimples he was now sporting were like icing on the cake.

"I'll have a steak and baked potato also, but could you make it a medium well?" Sam asked as he grinned at the waitress who was ogling him suggestively without writing down his order.

"Sure honey" Alison replied before walking away seductively and glancing back over her shoulder with a wonk at the youngest Winchester.

"Dude, she has got it bad for you" Dean smirked as he shook his head in wonderment. "Guess she doesn't know the better looking brother when she sees him."

"Whatever you say jerk" Sam replied as he bumped Dean with his shoulder playfully.

Approximately thirty minutes later, they were finishing off the best tasting steaks they had eaten in months and both of their stomachs was now full. As Alison handed over the bill to Dean, she took Sam by the hand and slipped a small piece of paper into it before curling his fingers around it. "Call me sometime handsome" she articulated in a sexy voice before walking seductively away once again.

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Three hours later, Dean noticed that Sammy was becoming nervous for some reason as he made the turn into the long driveway that led up to Singer Salvage Yard. He passed the old cars sitting out front that Bobby scavenged from when he needed spare parts on the classic automobiles you could usually find him working on. He pulled up and parked beside Bobby' old blue Ford pickup which sat in front of the comfortable looking white paneled house that was adorned with hubcaps on the wall. The hubcaps weren't just for decorative purposes however, they hid the protective signs and sigils that had been painted or carved into the off white paneling that covered the large house.

As Dean climbed out of the car, he noticed the front door open and saw Bobby walking out to greet them. He smiled at the old man who had become like a beloved uncle to them. Bobby had been there for him and Sammy when their father had died, so Dean felt it was only right to help out Bobby on this hunt when he needed it. "Hey Bobby, it's good seeing ya man" Dean said as he reached out to shake hands with the man. He was surprised however as Bobby took the offered hand and pulled him into a quick hug.

"Good to see you to kid, glad you boys could come. I've got your room all fixed up and some of my special chili cooking on the stove" Bobby informed Dean before walking around to the other side of the car and pulling Sam in for a quick hug. "You okay kiddo?" Bobby questioned as he looked Sam over intently. Something just seemed off with the youngest Winchester.

"Yeah M'fine, thanks for inviting us Bobby" Sam replied as he walked to the back of the Impala to get his things out of the trunk. He sort of lingered there as he wondered what Dean's reaction would be as he walked into the house. He had no doubt that Bobby already had the inside trimmed in Christmas decorations just as he did when they were little and visited him at Christmas time. He took a deep breath as he saw Dean walk up the steps and reach down to pet Bobby's guard dog Rumsfeld before pushing open the door and entering the house.

As Dean walked into the house, his mood immediately soured when he saw the decorated evergreen Christmas tree standing in the corner with it's colorful lights blinking on and off. "Damn it, I knew Sammy was up to something" he grumbled as he also noticed the eggnog and three glasses sitting on the coffee table in front of the sofa. He couldn't believe that Sam had tricked him in to coming to Bobby's place for Christmas. He didn't want anything to do with the damned gifts under the tree that he saw clearly marked with his name. Sam and Bobby had no right tricking him into trying to celebrate the holiday. He slung his duffle bag down in anger before turning around to see his baby brother entering the house.

"You son of a bitch" Dean grated out just before he balled his hand into a fist and punched his baby brother in the mouth.

Sam stumbled back into stunned Bobby from the blow since he was unprepared for Dean's physical reaction at seeing the decorations. Tears glistened in his blue-green eyes as he raised his hand to his mouth and wiped away the blood that was now trailing down his chin from a split lip. "Dean, I…"

"I frigging told you that I didn't want to celebrate the holiday Sam" Dean said cutting Sammy off mid sentence. "You had no right in deceiving me to get me here you bastard."

"Hold it right there ya damned idjit before you do something else you'll regret" Bobby said in anger. "This isn't Sammy's fault. I'm the one who called him and asked him to bring you here. If you're going to blame somebody, then blame me since it was my idea. And let me tell you one more damned thing boy, if I ever see you hit your brother like that again, I'll take you over my knee and spank that ass of yours like you deserve for acting like a damned fool."

"Stay out of this Bobby, this is between me and Sam" Dean grated out through clenched teeth before refocusing his attention on his little brother. "You can't honestly tell me that you didn't know what Bobby was doing. Damn it Sam, you know how I felt about this. You never said one damned word even after I warned you that you better not be lying to me about the reason for coming. Looks like I can't trust you anymore can I little brother?'

"Dean, M'sorry, I just thought…"

"No Sam, that's the problem, you didn't think. You just decided to ignore my feelings to meet your own selfish needs. Well I don't want any part of it. I'm leaving in the morning whether you come with me or not" Dean informed his brother before gathering up his duffle bag and stomping off up the stairs and entering the room that Bobby had prepared for them. He threw his stuff on the bed and then turned around to lock the door. There was no way he was going to listen to Sammy's excuses tonight for what he had done. The back stabbing jerk could sleep on the sofa for all he cared right now.

"Bobby, I'm sorry you had to witness that" Sam apologized feeling responsible for Dean's outburst. He should have known better to bring Dean to Bobby's place with the way he had been acting lately.

"S'alright kiddo" I'll just put the presents away for another time. I'm sorry for getting Dean so upset with ya Sam. I just didn't know how bad he was still hurting I guess.

"Don't worry about it Bobby. I'm gonna go on up to bed to and see if I can work things with Dean. Sorry we ruined your Christmas" Sam said as he hung his head in embarrassment.

"S'not your fault Sam so there's no reason to apologize. I'll see you boys in the morning before you leave" Bobby said before walking to the kitchen to have dinner alone. He felt bad not being able to help the Winchesters through their grief.

Sam trudged up the stairs after Bobby walked away and grasped the bedroom door knob and turned it only to find that the door was locked.

"Dean, open the door" Sam called out as he leaned his head wearily against the closed door.

"Go away Sam, I'm in no mood to talk to you tonight" Dean informed him before rolling over on his bed and shutting out the light.

Sam sighed before turning away and walked back down the steps. "Looks like I'm sleeping on the sofa tonight" he informed Bobby as he grabbed a blanket and a pillow from the hallway closet. He walked into the living room and made himself as comfortable as possible on the sofa that wasn't nearly long enough for his large frame. He knew the chances of him sleeping tonight would be close to zero.

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The next morning, Dean walked by Sammy without saying a word as he pulled on his jacket and boots before stepping out into the sleet and ice that was falling from the morning sky. The weather had turned ugly overnight and he was eager to get an early start to find a bar where he could drink himself into a stupor.

Sam quickly pulled on his sneakers and jacket before grabbing his duffle and following Dean out the door after bidding Bobby goodbye. He saw the hurt look in the man's eyes and felt guilty for having to leave him that way. "I'll call you" he promised as he quickly jogged down the stairs to catch up with Dean. He tossed his stuff into the trunk and then climbed into the passenger side of the car just as Dean started the engine. He sighed as he felt the beginnings of a migraine headache coming on from lack of sleep and stress.

They hadn't even been on the road an hour when Dean turned to glare at him. "I can't believe you did that to me Sammy. Why do you always have to have things your way huh? Why can't you just consider my feelings for once. I gave up my whole childhood for you and you turn around and stab me in the back like an ungrateful little bitch for it."

"Dean, that's not what I was doing" Sam said as he tried his best to ignore the malicious words that Dean had just said. "When Bobby called, he sounded so lonely that I just…"

"You just what Sammy, chose to consider his feelings over mine? Am I not good enough for you that you feel like you have to treat me like dirt?"

"Dean, that's not fair, You're my brother and I love you"

"Yeah, well you sure don't act like it. Sometimes you can really be a bitch you know" Dean said just as the car hit a patch of black ice and began to slide wickedly down the road.

"Damn it, hold on" Dean ground out as he fought the wheel. The car continued it's hazardous slide before slamming into an electric pole causing one of the power lines to snap and drop to the road bring the car to a shuddering halt.

"Shit" Dean yelled before pushing open the door and climbing out to see the damage. "What else can go wrong" he yelled up to the angry looking sky as rain and sleet continued to fall. He never noticed that Sam had pushed open his door and was climbing out of the car too. He looked over just in time to see Sam place his feet in a water puddle that the electric line had fallen into.

"Oh my God Sammy No" he yelled out in panic as he saw his brother's body convulse rigorously from the shock of standing in the electrified water.

**TBC _ I know this chapter moved at a fairly quick pace but I am hoping to have the story finished by Christmas. With any luck, I will have a chapter up each day now until Christma day. Criminally Charmed, You asked for longer chapters so I hope this one meets to your approval._**


	3. Chapter 3

**Still, Still, Still --A Christmas to Remember Ch. 3**

**Disclaimer: **Still don't own them and still not making a profit. I also don't own the words to the Christmas song Still, Still, Still!

**A.N. **Once again, I have no medical knowledge and the information used to treat Sammy has been googled.

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**Previously: **_"Oh my God Sammy No" Dean yelled out in panic as he saw his brother's body convulse rigorously from the shock of standing in the electrified water. _

Dean's mind automatically kicked into soldier mode the moment he saw his brother begin to convulse. He had to get the electrical wire away from Sammy or he would most definitely lose his brother. He automatically stripped his jacket off and threw it on the ground to stand upon to keep his own feet out of the water. He then removed his shirt and wrapped it around his hands to insulate himself, thankful that the rain has just quit falling. He couldn't afford to allow the cloth to get wet. He quickly reached out to grab a hold of the wire and slung it quickly towards the ditch not caring about possibly being shocked himself, his only thoughts were for Sammy. Afterwards, he jogged to the back of the Impala and grabbed the wooden handles that they used for the axe heads. He quickly placed the wood under Sam's arms and pulled him away from the electrified water.

"No, No, No, No, No" he muttered as he bent down to check on Sammy. He didn't know how much voltage his brother's body had sustained from the severe electrical shock but knew that any little amount was too much. He bent down and ripped open Sam's jacket and placed his hand upon Sam's chest to feel for any movement in his chest.

"Son of a bitch he's not breathing" Dean gasped as he pushed Sammy's head back at an angle and forced his mouth open. He quickly gave two breaths and then watched for the rise of Sam's chest. Seeing nothing, he placed his fingers near the breastbone just below the heart and started CPR. He quickly did fifteen compressions and then gave Sammy two more rescue breaths. He did the rotation another two times before stopping to check for a pulse. "No damn it" he yelled as he felt nothing with his fingertips and started CPR once again. After two more rounds of compressions, he was relieved to find a faint pulse beneath his finger tips when he checked Sam's radial artery. As he held his hand in place on the artery, he pulled out his phone with the other hand and quickly dialed 9-1-1.

After the operator picked up, he gave her the information that she would need to get help to them as soon as possible before hanging up even though she had asked him to stay on the line. Feeling the shivers starting to wrack his own body with the adrenaline fade, Dean knew he couldn't leave Sammy lying on the freezing road. He gently pickled up his baby brother and placed him on the back seat of the Impala. He then rushed to the open trunk and pulled out two insulated blankets. He quickly bundled Sammy in one and then wrapped the other around himself as he sat back to wait for the ambulance. He thanked God that they weren't too far out of town so help should arrive fast. He had only been sitting a couple of minutes when he heard the sound of a siren blaring in the distance. "Their on their way Sammy, you're gonna be okay kiddo."

As Dean cradled his brother to him, he looked up just in time to see the ambulance come screeching to a halt with it's brilliant blinking red lights ablaze. He saw two people dressed as EMT's climb from the back, each carrying a box in their hand. He breathed a sigh of relief as they quickly approached the car. Sammy was finally going to get medical attention.

"Sir, can you tell us exactly what happened?" Alicia asked as she pulled a stethoscope from around her neck and placed it to Sammy's chest while grabbing his wrist to take his pulse. Alicia was a stocky woman of medium height at about five foot six with piercing brown eyes. She had curly brown hair which she wore pulled back into a ponytail that hung midway down her back but Dean could see the gentleness in her face.

"We, hit-hit the electric pole when I lost control of the car and it cau-caused the electric line to snap and fall into a water puddle on the ground. When Sammy got out-out of the car, he stepped into the puddle where the line ha-had fallen" Dean explained with a stuttering voice as the seriousness of the situation weighed heavily upon his shoulders.

"I'm on it" the other paramedic said as he pulled of Sam's shoes and socks. He knew it was vital to find the entry and exit wound to learn just how far the electrical current had traveled through the young man's body. He winced in sympathy as he saw the large burn mark on Sam's left foot indicating the point of entry. The skin was charred and angry looking from the substantial burn on the foot. "Alicia, we need to find the point of exit" Jerry said as he watched his female partner taking Sammy's pulse praying that the current hadn't traveled too far. Alicia nodded as she quickly applied an oxygen mask over Sam's nose and mouth to aid with his labored breathing. It was obvious the stress of trying to pull in air was overtaxing his severely traumatized system.

Jerry worked off Sam's jeans to check his legs while Alicia started pulling off his sodden shirt to check for any signs of exit. "Got it" Alicia stated as she found the exit wound just above Sam's right hip. Like his foot, Sam's side was severely traumatized and burnt where the current had left his body. The skin was somewhat charred and angry looking indicating that Sam most likely had deep tissue burn. Jerry opened his medication box and pulled out some burn cream and sterile bandages to do what little he could to treat the burns knowing that it wouldn't be nearly enough. He worried about the length that the current had traveled through Sam's body. It would most likely have caused organ damage and the kid before him just couldn't afford that kind of damage to his body.

Being a man of fifty five years of age, Jerry hated seeing cases like this where the victim was relatively young and so severely traumatized. He had seen other patients who had received a less severe shock to their bodies like the young man before him and most of them didn't survive.

After they stabilized Sam as best they could, Jerry ran back to the ambulance to get the gurney. He and Alicia pulled Sam from the back seat of the Impala and carefully placed him on the gurney and then rushed him to the back of the waiting ambulance with a stunned Dean following quickly behind. After Sam was placed in the ambulance, Alicia pulled out some thermal blankets and placed them over Sam as she hooked him up to a cardiac machine. "This man is throwing PVC's at an alarming rate" Alicia said as she watched the readout on the machine. "We've got to get him to the hospital ASAP."

Jerry instructed Dean to climb into the ambulance and then climbed in himself. He was worried that the boy before him was falling into shock with they way he was acting so sluggish. His face had significantly paled upon arrival and he was shivering, whether it was from the cold or witnessing what his brother went through, Jerry wasn't sure. Upon closing the doors and making sure everything was secure, Jerry thumped his hand near the front of the ambulance to let the driver know they were ready to transport.

As the ambulance raced towards the hospital, the EMT's continued working on Sammy. Jerry started an IV to administer fluids while Alicia monitored his breathing which had become more labored even though Sam was receiving oxygen through the mask covering his nose and mouth. After a minute or two, she noticed that his breathing had almost completely stopped.

"Jerry, he's going into respiratory distress" she called out as she opened up the trauma box and pulled the intubation equipment from it. Both Alicia and Jerry were aware of the fact that most electrical shock trauma victims eventually suffered from diaphragm paralysis due to the interruption of cervical motor neurons to their central nervous system. The diaphragm automatically slowed down it's functioning as the nervous system became confused.

"Oh God, Sammy" Dean whispered as he watched Jerry and Alicia begin to frantically work on his baby brother once again. He knew things had just gotten worse as Sammy stopped breathing once again. "Please don't give up little brother" he whispered as he watched Jerry prepare Sammy for intubation.

Jerry took hold of Sam's head and put it in what was referred to as the _sniffing the morning air _position with the neck slightly flexed and the head extended. While Jerry got Sam's head into position, Alicia pulled on a pair of sterile gloves and opened the package holding the sterilized laryngoscope and endotrachial tube. She put the scope in the right side of Sam's mouth as she moved his tongue to the left for better access. She advanced the scope forward until she was able to see cartilage at the back of Sam's throat. As she advanced it a tad bit further, she could finally see the small triangular opening between the vocal cords which was where the tube needed to be placed. She then opened the sterilized package and gently inserted the endotrachial tube into Sam's mouth until it advanced through the vocal cords. Once the intubation was confirmed by bilateral breath sounds. She inflated the cuff and then secured the tubing to Sam's upper jaw with tape to hold it firmly in place and then hooked it up to the portable ventilating machine which they kept in the ambulance.

Dean was taking deep breaths trying to calm himself as Alicia finished the intubation to keep from throwing up. He had never seen his brother have a tube shoved down his throat and it was something he never wanted to witness again in his lifetime. He had to close his eyes as the tube was pushed even further or risk gagging and distracting the EMT's who were working on his baby brother.

"He's intubated" Alicia confirmed as Jerry finally released the secure hold he had on Sam's head and placed it back into a more relaxing position so as not to overstrain the muscles in his neck. She glanced over to the heart monitor that Sam was hooked to and saw that the PVC's were getting worse. "Damn it, he's gonna crash" she called out just at the ambulance pulled up to the ER bay.

Jerry quickly threw open the back doors as a doctor came rushing up. "We got a male in his early twenties. He's suffering from a severe electrical shock. He's coded once already and he went into respiratory distress on the way in" he said as he reached in to pull the gurney with Sam on it out. They were just starting into the hospital when Alicia shouted. "He's coding." They immediately stopped the gurney and Alicia climbed up on top and straddled Sam's stomach as she quickly began CPR. She felt the gurney moving once again while she worked as Jerry and Dr. Steven Daniels pushed them into the hospital and behind the swinging treatment doors.

Dean was following behind the group when he heard Alicia say that Sammy had coded. His heart thumped rapidly in his chest as he realized Sammy's heart had quit beating. He saw black spots beginning to dance in front of his eyes and took calming breaths knowing that he couldn't pass out now, he had to remain with his brother. He saw Alicia climb up on the gurney and begin CPR as Jerry and the other man started pushing them inside the ER doors. Dean made to follow them but was immediately stopped by a male dressed in scrubs.

"I'm sorry sir, but you'll have to wait out here" the orderly informed Dean as he tried to make his way into the treatment rooms.

"But he's my brother" Dean pleaded as he tried to push the man out of the way.

"I understand that sir, but you'll only be in the way. The best thing you can do to help your brother right now is fill out some admittance forms so the doctors will have his medical history." The orderly led Dean over to the nurses desk where he was given five different forms to fill out.

Dean held the papers in his hand and looked at them trying to figure out what they were for. The writing looked foreign to him as his eyes shimmered with tears and the lines on the paper blended together. He quickly swiped his eyes and then tried to pull himself together for the sake of Sammy. It took him quite a few minutes, but he managed to get all of the forms filled out. As he sat in the chair waiting with his knees bouncing up in down in nervousness, he suddenly realized that he needed to call Bobby and inform him of what happened. Bobby would want to be there since he had become a father figure to them. Dean pulled out his cell phone and scrolled down until he found the correct number. He hit the button and waited for the man to pick up. He felt a small amount of comfort when he heard Bobby's voice come over the phone.

"Singer here, what can I do for you?"

"Bobby, it's De-Dean"

Bobby could hear the anxiety in Dean's voice and immediately knew that something was wrong. Assuming that Dean had lost his temper again, Bobby immediately went into angry mode.

"Dean, you better have not went off on that brother of yours again. Damn it boy, when are you gonna realize that Sam lost his daddy too."

"I kn-know that Bobby"

"Well you damned sure aren't acting like it. Tell me Dean, how many times have you struck out at Sammy in anger? Just how many times have you used the kid as your own personal punching bag?"

"I didn't me-mean"

"Yeah, well Sammy's face sure is paying the price for something you didn't mean to do isn't it/ Do you know how badly you hurt that brother of yours by locking him out of the room last night boy. He was coming up to try and make amends. Instead of allowing him that small comfort, you shut him out! Just before I went to bed last night, I could hear soft sobs coming from the living room as Sam tried to hide his pain. Dean you're going to lose that kid if you don't get your head out of your ass and start acting like a brother instead of a stupid ass bastard."

"Bobby please" Dean sobbed as the words hit close to home, making him realize just how truly awful he had been to Sammy over the past few weeks. He felt tremendous guilt consume him as he openly began to cry.

Hearing the sound of Dean's cries coming through the phone, Bobby immediately became extremely anxious knowing that something bad must have happened for Dean to show his emotions so openly.

"Dean, what is it? What's wrong boy?" Bobby asked with a shaking tone to his own voice.

"It's Sammy Bobby, he's hurt real bad. God, we need you Bobby, please."

"Dean just tell me where you are and I'll be there as fast as possible."

"We hit some, some ice Bo-Bobby, The car, it, the wire fell, he stepped, Oh God Bobby, it's bad."

"Dean, tell me where are son?" Bobby shouted with anxiety about to overwhelm him.

"We're at…at…" Bobby heard the sound of what he assumed to be the phone falling to the floor.

"Dean, Dean, answer me kid" he shouted praying that Dean could get himself together long enough to tell him where they were.

"Are you there sir?" a female voice asked as Bobby waited impatiently for somebody to pick up the phon

"Yes, please can you just tell me where you are?" Bobby pleaded as he started his old blue Ford pickup and pulled out of his driveway.

"Yes sir, I am a nurse at Sioux City Memorial Hospital." I assume you are some kind of family to this young man.

"Yes, I'm the boys uncle. Can you please tell me what happened?" Bobby asked as he made a right turn on the road out of his driveway to head towards the hospital.

"I'm sorry sir but your nephews were involved in a serious accident. Their car hit an electric pole causing the line to snap. I'm sorry to say that the youngest of the two received a severe electrical shock as he stepped out of the car. All I can tell you is that the doctors are trying to stabilize him right now."

"Oh God, Sammy" Bobby mumbled as he felt tears starting to fall from his eyes. "Tell Dean that I'll be there as soon as I can" he said before pushing the button on his cell phone to end the call. As he drove like a bat out of hell towards the hospital, Bobby prayed that things weren't as bad as they sounded for Sammy.

**TBC**


	4. Chapter 4

_**Still, Still, Still --A Christmas to Remember Ch. 4**_

_**Disclaimer: **__Still don't own them and still not making a profit. I also don't own the lyrics to the Christmas song Still, Still, Still!_

_**A.N. **__Before you start reading this chapter I __**DO NOT **__write death fics._

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_**Previously: **__"Tell Dean that I'll be there as soon as I can" Bobby said before pushing the button on his cell phone to end the call. As he drove like a bat out of hell towards the hospital, Bobby prayed that things weren't as bad as they sounded for Sammy._

Upon arriving at the hospital, Bobby walked into the ER to see Dean sitting in one of the padded seats with his elbows propped on his knees and his head in his hands. It was obvious that Dean was having a tough time by the way he was rocking back and forth at a very quick pace oblivious to everyone and everything around him. As he got closer, Bobby could hear the sound of muffled sobs coming from the young man and he had come to think of as a son.

"Dean?" Bobby questioned as he lay a comforting hand on the top of Dean's head to give him whatever little support he could. He noticed Dean immediately cease his rocking and watched as the kid raised his head to look at him. Bobby's breath was literally stolen away as he saw the shattered look in Dean's swollen and red eyes. Bobby immediately dropped to his knees and pulled Dean into a tight hug and rubbed his back in comforting circles. He could feel the shivers running through his body and ran his hands up and down Dean's arm trying to create some warmth for him as Dean rested his head against his shoulder. "I'm here for you boys, you just let me carry the burden for awhile."

"He, he quit breathing Bobby and his heart stopped" Dean said in between hitched breaths as he relaxed into Bobby's embrace. "The doctors haven't came out and told me anything yet."

Bobby's face drained upon hearing the words but he had to remain strong for Dean since he knew that it was what Sammy would want him to do. He couldn't allow himself to break down too as Dean was only holding it together by a fragile thread right now. "He's a fighter Dean. We just have to pray that Sammy will have the strength to make it through this."

"S'my fault Bobby, it's all my fault. If I hadn't acted like suck a prick and took off this morning in bad weather then Sammy wouldn't be in there fighting for his life right now. How am I going to live with myself if Sammy dies. I just can't lose him Bobby, I can't."

Bobby sighed upon hearing the words. He knew that Dean was right. If he hadn't been in such a pissy mood lately, the boys would have been at home with him, safe and sound instead of out in the frigid and destructive weather. "You're right Dean, you shouldn't have taken off this morning in the sleet and freezing rain, but there's nothing you can do about that now. What's done is done. We just have to prepare ourselves to deal with the consequences now. Whatever the outcome, I'll be here for you boys just as I always have been. We'll suffer the consequences together."

"I was yelling at him when it happened Bobby. I accused him of stabbing me in the back and called him an ungrateful little bitch and now he's in there fighting for his life and I can't tell him that I'm sorry, that I didn't mean the words I said. God Bobby, what am I gonna do?"

"I wish I knew Ace, I wish I knew" Bobby stated with a sigh as he rubbed the back of Dean's head with his hands. It scared him to think that Sam's recovery could depend on his will to fight. If he thought that Dean was mad at him enough to leave him, then Sam could very well give up. "Let me go ask and see if there is any news yet."

Just as Bobby stood up to make his way over towards the nurses station, he saw the ER doors swing open and a doctor walk out with a weary look on his face as he rubbed a palm across his cheek. He sucked in a breath as he heard the doctor call out "Family of Sam Winchester."

Bobby helped Dean to stand up and they both started walking towards the doctor. He reached his hand out to shake the man's hand and said ""m Bobby Singer, his uncle and this is Sam's brother Dean."

"I'm sorry to meet you under such circumstances. If you will follow me, I would like to talk to you about Sam's condition."

Bobby and Dean followed the doctor down a long hall and into what they assumed to be his office. The doctor asked them to sit in the chairs while he went around to sit at his desk. Dr. Daniels placed his folded hands on the desk in front of him and then began to speak.

"I wish I had better news for you. As you know, Sam was brought in suffering from severe electrical shock and that he went into respiratory distress and soon coded. We we're able to get him back, but Sam's body has suffered too much trauma. When the electrical current entered through his left foot, it traveled up his leg and into the stomach area. In doing so, it moved around inside his abdominal cavity and hit a few of his internal organs before exiting the body through his right hip. The organs were so severely traumatized that they are beginning to shut down. His kindeys have basicall shut down completely and the liver is well on it's way."

Bobby's face blanched at hearing the news. He didn't need to be told what would happen next. Sam had just been given a death sentence. He couldn't hold back the tears that sprung to his eyes as he reverently whispered "Lord help us." He reached over to grasp Dean's hand in support as he saw the anger building in Dean's eyes.

Dr. Daniels felt sorry for the men in front of him as he watched them trying to assimilate the news. He really hated to tell them this last part, but he felt the men deserved to know just how little time their loved one had left. "It won't be long before the rest of Sam's body starts shutting down and it will lead to his death. I would say that he only has twenty fours hours at most. You might want to call your family priest in to give him his last rites."

"No, you're lying you cold hearted son of a bitch" Dean yelled as he jumped to his feet and leaned across the desk to snatch the doctor up by his coat lapel. "My brother isn't dying. You hear me? He. Is. Not. Dying."

Bobby quickly rose to his feet and pulled Dean away from the doctor as he wrapped his arms around Dean and pulled him back. He struggled to hold on to Dean as he fought to get out of the embrace knowing what Dean would do to the doctor if he didn't. "I'm sorry doc, His baby brother is all he has left" Bobby apologized trying to explain Dean's actions

"I totally understand Mr. Singer. I'll give you and Dean some privacy while you adjust to the news. Sam is in ICU room number six when you are ready to go in and say…well, you know" Dr. Daniels said before quietly leaving his office to give Sam's family some privacy.

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Approximately thirty minutes later, Bobby led a shaky and morose Dean down the corridor towards the Intensive Care Unit. He didn't know how they were going to be able to walk in that room seeing Sammy for what would be the last time without breaking down. He had his arm wrapped securely around Dean's shoulder and could feel the trembles running through his quivering body. He noticed that the closer they got to the ICU, the more Dean's legs seemed to want to give way on him. God how he wished Jim were here right now to try and provide words of comfort, but he had died not too long before John did because of that bitch Meg. As they stood just outside the door, Bobby caught Dean as his knees finally gave away and he lowered them both to the floor.

"I can't Bobby, I can't go in there and say goodbye. He's my baby brother. I'm supposed to go first not him. It's not right."

"Dean, Sammy needs to know that we're here. He needs to know that we'll be okay. You don't want his last moments to be ones of loneliness do you, thinking that nobody cares."

"God no Bobby, I just…I can't handle being left alone"

"I know Dean, I Promise I'll be there for you as long as you need me son. I ain't goin nowhere!"

"Thanks Bobby" Dean said as he walked into the room to find Sammy laying as still as a mannequin on the too short bed. He gasped as he saw all the wires coming from his brother's body. He didn't know that one person could be hooked up to so many different machines. Sammy had IV's coming out of both hands and out of a port that was placed in his shoulder. He had a pulse oximeter attached to his finger and a blood pressure cuff that stayed wrapped around his left bicep. His chest had leads connected to it that led over to the heart monitor which showed that his heart rate and pulse was low. There were even a few wires coming out from under the blanket that had Sammy covered up from his stomach and down.

Slowly, Dean reached out to grasp one of Sam's hands in his being careful not to disturb the IV. "Hey Sammy, I'm here for you little brother. You can rest easy now." Dean said as he wiped the tears falling down his cheek with his free hand to no avail as more took their place. He pulled up a chair and sat quietly holding his baby brother's hand and remembering different aspects of their lives together. He cried as he remembered Sammy's first word which had been "De." He remembered his first steps, first tooth, first birthday and all of the other important firsts in Sam's life. How could he be expected to let him go now?

As Dean glanced over towards the window to see the falling snow, he thought about the fact that it was now Christmas Eve and how it was his mom's favorite time of year. She would have been so disappointed in him for the way he had been acting lately. All Sammy had wanted was to have a little Christmas celebration and he had acted like a damned grinch. Maybe it wasn't too late to give Sammy one last Christmas, maybe he could make things peaceful for him by sharing the only memory he had of his mother during their last Christmas as a family before the fire.

"Ya know Sammy, I remember a song that Mom used to sing to me on Christmas Eve when I had trouble falling asleep. It was mom's favorite song and I thought you might like to hear it little brother. Dean closed his eyes and began to hum the tune as the words came rushing back to him and he began to sing.

_Still, still, still, One can hear the falling snow. For all is hushed, The world is sleeping, Holy Star its vigil keeping. Still, still, still, One can hear the falling snow. Sleep, sleep, sleep, 'Tis the eve of our Saviour's birth. The night is peaceful all around you, Close your eyes, Let sleep surround you. Sleep, sleep, sleep, 'Tis the eve of our Saviour's birth. Dream, dream, dream, Of the joyous day to come. While guardian angels without number, Watch you as you sweetly slumber. Dream, dream, dream, Of the joyous day to come._

Bobby silently cried as he listened to the beautiful song coming from Dean's mouth. He couldn't imagine a more wonderful present for Sam than for Dean to share the memory of his mother through music. He just wished it didn't take such a tragedy to get Dean to open up to his bay brother about their mom. He watched as Dean lowered his forehead until it was touching Sammy's and began to speak. He turned away and looked out the window so as not to intrude on such a private moment between the brothers.

As Dean finished the song, he gently lay his head upon Sammy's. "I love you more than life itself Sammy and I will never forgive myself for hurting you the way I did. It was my actions that put you in this hospital and now the doctors are telling me I have to say goodbye. Well I can't do it Sammy. You've been my whole life and I don't know how to live it without you. I won't live it without you!"

Suddenly, it was as if time stood still and all motion ceased. Dean and Bobby heard everything go deathly silent as they felt a presence making itself known in the room. They had to shield their eyes as they saw a brilliant white glow emanate from out of nowhere and float over towards Sammy's bed. As the glowing shape started to take form, Dean and Bobby witnessed what appeared to be a person dressed in a brilliant white robe taking shape, both swearing that they could see the outline of wings. As the creature bowed it's head over Sammy with tears dripping onto Sammy's face, it began to speak.

"I am known as Hamied, the Angel of Miracles. I bestow upon you the gift of life as it is not your time to go Sam Winchester. You still have much left to do on this earth. You are a warrior of all that is good and all that is right. This world and it's inhabitants need you to continue in your fight to rid it of the forces of evil." The angel then bowed it's head as it placed it's immaculate hands on Sam's chest and stomach area. A glorious white essence seemed to radiate from it's hands and seep into Sam's being. After a minute, the glowing stopped as the angel looked Heavenward and said "It is done my Lord" before smiling at Bobby and Dean and blinking out of existence.

As Dean and Bobby stood in stunned silence, they could hear the heart monitor starting to emit a more continuous beat as Sammy's heart started a more normal pattern. They were still standing in stunned silence when the doctor came rushing into the room when Sam's monitors started beeping.

Dean watched with tears in his eyes as the doctor assessed his baby brother. "I don't understand, this isn't possible" the doctor kept repeating as Sam's vitals continue to improve. "This shouldn't be happening, I just don't understand."

Glancing over to Dean and Bobby with a look of wonder on his face, he said "I don't understand what just happened, but somehow Sam has just taken a turn for the better. It's like his body has reversed the dying process. I need to run some tests to confirm what is happening, but I'd say that Sam has a strong fighting chance now." He glanced down as if in thought before looking Dean in the eyes and saying. "I'd say that your brother just received a Christmas miracle."

**TBC **_**See, I told you I don't write death fics! I wish you all a Merry Christmas and that it is everything you wish it to be! **_


	5. Chapter 5

**Still, Still, Still --A Christmas to Remember Ch. 5**

**Disclaimer: **Still don't own them and still not making a profit. I also don't own the lyrics to the Christmas song Still, Still, Still!

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**Previously: **_I need to run some tests to confirm what is happening, but I'd say that Sam has a strong fighting chance now." He glanced down as if in thought before looking Dean in the eyes and saying. "I'd say that your brother just received a Christmas miracle."_

After twelve hours and dozens of tests later, the doctor confirmed that Sam was indeed making a miraculous recovery. He had progressed to the point where Dr. Daniels had removed him from the ventilator and Sam was now getting oxygen from the canula tubing beneath his nose. From the results of the body scan, the doctor had informed them that Sam's liver and kidneys were now functioning much better and would soon be at one hundred percent. Dr. Daniels did have one concern however and it was that the results of Sam's MRI had been inconclusive. He was worried that when Sam woke up, he would have some trouble adjusting since his neuron brain wave pattern was still irregular due to the shock to his system.

As Dean sat beside his brother waiting for him to wake up, he thought about the events of the previous night. His brother had literally been visited by an angel and given a second chance. In doing so, Dean had been given a second chance also to make things right with Sammy and he wasn't going to waste that chance. As soon as Sammy woke up, he was going to apologize for his behavior and all of the stupid things he had said. He planned on letting Sam know that things would be much better from now on, that he would make sure of it. He glanced up to see Bobby walking into the room with two cups of coffee.

"Here ya go Dean, I though you could use a jolt of caffeine to get your juices flowing" Bobby said as he handed Dean over a cup of the steaming hot brew. Dean had barely slept since the accident and Bobby was worried about him collapsing and ending up in the hospital himself.

"Thanks Bobby. The doctor was here while you were going and gave me the results of Sammy's test."

"Well what did he have to say, please tell me that it was good news." Bobby asked eagerly needing to know how Sam was doing.

"Yeah it is, the doc says that Sammy should wake up soon. He said the tests show that Sam's liver and kidneys are doing fine, but he's worried about Sam's MRI results. He thinks Sam might have a little trouble with connecting the dots so to speak since the synapses in his brain are misfiring. They're not connecting the way they should. He said that it's most likely from the electrical shock and that it should return to normal in a few days."

"S'good Dean, but it means you'll have to be patient with the kid when he says or does things that get to you. You can't allow yourself to blow up at him."

"Don't you think that I know that Bobby" Dean grumbled as he ran his fingers through Sammy's hair wishing he would just wake up already.

"Damn it Dean, that's what I'm talking about. You're already grumpy just because of what I said to you about being patient. That red hot temper of yours is what got you boys into this mess in the first place. All I'm saying is that you've got to watch yourself around Sammy. The kid is hurting whether you realize it or not. You've got to stop taking things out on him just because you're angry or don't like what he does or says. I know you're hurting too boy and I can understand that, but Sam was never like you and your dad when it came to hiding your emotions, Sam has always worn his heart on a stick meaning that he's always been more vulnerable. You've got start thinking before you act, especially where it concerns Sammy."

"I know that Bobby and I'll be more careful, I swear I will. When he wakes up, I'm going to make sure he knows how much I care about him and how bad I feel for hurting him the way I did."

"I hope so Dean, or your going to lose the kid forever" Bobby replied worried about what that would do to both brothers. They had been so close growing up and even finished each other's thoughts half the time. It hurt to see them in the place they were now, angry or upset with one another.

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As Sam started to come too, he wondered what the hell had happened to him. His muscles were all tight like a stretched bungee cord and he was having trouble putting things together in his mind. He remembered being in the car and Dean calling him a prick, complaining about having to give up his childhood for him but it warred with the part that said _"As long as I'm around, nobody is going to hurt you little brother." _It just didn't make sense. If Dean loved him then why did he consider him a burden and hurt him with his words. He didn't know Dean had considered him to be a heavy burden, he thought Dean liked spending time with him. If he had known, he would have just walked away. He would just have to start relying only on himself and forget about Dean and his eternal bad attitude. He didn't need his brother and he would just have to show him that.

As he became more alert, he could feel fingers running through his hair tenderly and the sound of voices. He couldn't understand what they were saying because the words just seemed to be all jumbled in his brain. He recognized one of them as Dean's and the other as Bobby's. From the sound of it, they were arguing and it was probably about him. _"Damn it, guess I must have messed up again" _he thought to himself with disdain. Knowing that he had to start taking care of himself, he turned his head to the side trying to get away from the comforting touch of those fingers running through his hair as he mumbled the words "N-no, stop."

Dean was stunned to feel Sam move away from his touch, even more so when he heard Sammy tell him to stop. Sam had never shied away from his touch before, he always took solace in knowing Dean was there. "Sammy, open your eyes for me little brother" he said as he reached out and placed a hand on Sam's chest.

It took a few tries but Sam finally opened his eyes to see Dean standing beside his bed. He wondered why Dean was acting so concerned about him when obviously all he wanted was to get away from him as was evident by his outburst in the car. Maybe he was just staying out of pity and Sam didn't want any part of that.

"M'fine, you can l-leave now" Sam mumbled cursing himself for the way his voice broke on the word leave. It made him sound weak and unable to take care of himself.

"Sammy I'm not gonna leave you. Why would I wanna do that?" Dean questioned wondering what in the hell was going through Sammy's mind right now. The kid wasn't making any sense.

"I can take care of my-myself now, don't need you to give up anymore of your l-life just to take c-care of me" Sam said as he tried to roll on his side away from Dean. He gasped as his tense muscles protested the movement and fought back the tears that were trying to spring up in his eyes.

Dean looked at Bobby with shock and uncertainty in his eyes not understanding what Sammy meant. "Sammy, I don't understand what you mean by that. I'm not giving up my life by taking care of you dude."

"S'not what you said-said in the car Dean, said you gave up your whole li-life for me. Don't n-need you anymore, just go and leave me alone."

Dean's heart plummeted as he remembered what he had said just before the car crashed into the electric pole. He had been so angry with Sam and had said the first thing that came to his mind trying to make Sam feel guilty. Now those words were coming back to haunt him.

"Sammy, I swear to you I didn't…"

"Just l-leave pl-please. Don't wanna talk to you" Sam pleaded as he cut off his brother's statement and closed his eyes once again. He was too tired to argue anymore and his head was really beginning to hurt like a bitch.

Dean hung his head as Sammy basically shut himself off from him. "God Bobby, what did I do to him, how in the hell am I supposed to fix this? Dean questioned as he looked to the older man for guidance to correct the major mistake he had made.

"You're just gonna have to give him some time Dean. He's having a rough time as he tries to sort things through his head. I think it would be best for now if you do as he asks and just leave for a little while, go back to the Salvage yard and get you a decent night's sleep. I'll stay here with the kid."

"Yeah, I think you're right" Dean said as he heard Sam gasp in pain and saw him grab his head. "Right now my being here is hurting him and I've done that enough." he said with a heavy heart.

He stood up and started to trudge out of the room. Before he left though, he turned back to Bobby and silently mouthed "Please call me if anything happens or if he needs me" He watched as Bobby nodded his head that he would and then turned around to leave for what he knew would be lonesome trip

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As Dean drove back towards Bobby's place he couldn't remember ever feeling more alone than he did right now. The brother he had sworn to protect was lying in a hospital recovering from nearly having been killed and didn't even want him there. He couldn't blame Sammy though with the way he had treated him lately. Hell if he were Sammy, he would have given himself the cold shoulder treatment too. Dean tried to not take offense by the way Sammy was acting towards him, but damned if it didn't hurt…all the more so when he realized that he had done the exact same thing to Sammy, only he didn't have a medical reason for being such an ass!

As Dean pulled the sleek black Impala into Singer Salvage Yard, he dreaded going into the empty house alone. Who was he kidding by agreeing to coming home, because that's they way he thought of Bobby's place now, and getting a good night's rest. There was no way in hell he was going to be able to sleep in that room with the other bed empty. He never really did sleep very well when Sam wasn't around since he didn't have the sound of Sam's even breathing and slight snoring to lure him into a restful sleep.

Removing the key from the hide-a-way compartment in the middle porch step, Dean unlocked the door and let himself into the dark house. He flipped the light switch on the wall as he tossed his brown leather jacket over the back of the worn looking sofa. Hating the silence in the house right now, he walked over and turned on the television just to hear the sound of some voices talking. He then walked into the kitchen and turned the coffee pot on, sure that it was going to be a long night and that he would be craving the caffeine. While the coffee was brewing, he decided to go upstairs and take a shower since he was beginning to smell kind of ripe after staying at the hospital.

After he stripped down and stepped into the shower, he allowed the hot water to cascade down over his head and loosen the tense muscles in his neck and back as he stood under the scalding water. He allowed his mind to drift wishing that things could go back to normal and that he and Sammy were cruising down the open road once again. As the water began to turn cool, he quickly lathered himself with soap and then rinsed off before climbing out of the shower and getting dressed.

He thought about calling Bobby as he returned to the kitchen, but then remembered he had agreed to give Sammy some time to adjust to things. He knew Bobby would take damned good care of his little brother, but it just wasn't the same as being there with the kid and seeing that he was alright. What if Sammy had a relapse and he wasn't there for him. He lightly shivered as he shook the negative thought from his head, he was not going down that road. Sammy was going to be fine and that was all there was to it.

He fixed himself a bowl of the chili that Bobby had stored in the refrigerator and warmed it up in the microwave before carrying it into the living room and sitting down on the sofa. He watched some old reruns of Baywatch but the girls in their skimpy red bathing suits just didn't catch his attention as his mind kept drifting back to the hospital and what Sammy might be doing now. He hoped that Sam was getting some rest. Hopefully things would be better in the morning and Sammy would be asking for him.

**TBC **_Sorry this chapter is short, but I had a headache that just refused to leave me alone._


	6. Chapter 6

**Still, Still, Still --A Christmas to Remember Ch. 6**

**Disclaimer: **Still don't own them and still not making a profit. I also don't own the lyrics to the Christmas song Still, Still, Still!

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**Previously: **_Dean's mind kept drifting back to the hospital and what Sammy might be doing now. He hoped that Sam was getting some rest. Hopefully things would be better in the morning and Sammy would be asking for him._

As Dean woke up the next morning to the sun streaking through the curtains and blinding him, he couldn't believe that he had actually fallen asleep sitting on the couch while watching television. _"Hmmm, must have been more tired than I thought"_ he said to himself as he stood up to stretch the aching muscles in his back from sleeping on the hard sofa. Realizing that he had made Sam sleep there before the accident, he felt the guilt starting to consume him once again. How many times could he hurt Sammy before Sam gave up on him?

Wanting to get back to his brother, he grabbed his leather jacket and pulled it on as he pulled his car keys from his pocket. He had been grateful to the police for once for having it towed to the garage right beside the hospital so that it had been available when he needed it. As he walked outside into the wintery wonderland and saw it in the light of day, he gasped as he noticed the damage to his girl. "Damn," he mumbled as he ran his hand along the dented front bumper and side front panel, he hadn't noticed that damage in the dark of night when he had left the hospital last night. "Sorry girl, but your going to have to wait" he said as he walked around to climb into the car since it was more important to get back to Sammy right now. He put the key into the ignition and fired up the engine as he reached over to turn the heat on. He shivered for just a minute as he was blasted by cold air, but it didn't take long for the muscle car to warm up and Dean was warm and toasty once again. He put the car into reverse and pulled out of Bobby's driveway eager to get to the hospital.

As he made the drive towards Sioux City Memorial, he hoped that Sammy was ready to see him this morning. He had thought about calling Bobby to find out what Sammy's mood was, but decided against it. Even if Sam was still upset with him, he needed to see with his own eyes that his little brother was still okay, he couldn't chance being told to stay away over the telephone. Spotting a local Denny's restaurant, he pulled in and picked up some sausage and egg biscuits along with some coffee for himself and Bobby. He thought about getting Sammy something too, but he wasn't sure whether or not the doctor had him on a bland diet right now so he chose against it. Sammy had most likely had breakfast already anyway since hospitals seemed to enjoy waking their patients up at six o'clock in the morning just to feed them. Honestly, who in the hell in their right minds would get up at ix in the morning.

Twenty minutes later, he pulled into the parking garage at the hospital and found a parking spot on the third floor. He ignored the elevator and took the stairs to the bottom choosing not to wait on the elevator, since they were notorious for being slow anyway. He entered the hospital and walked straight past the nurses desk since he already knew where his brother was located. If Sam had been moved out of the ICU, Bobby would have called him. The closer he got to Sammy's room though, the more nervous he became. "Please don't be mad at me anymore Sammy" he whispered. "I really need my baby brother back."

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Sam was awakened from a restless sleep by the sound of a too cheery voice as a bubbly girl came walking into the room. He glanced up at the clock on the hospital wall to see that it was only six-fifteen in the morning. He yawned and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes as he plastered on a fake smile for the candy striper delivering his breakfast.

"Good morning sir" Lily replied as she placed Sam's breakfast on the small adjustable table before pushing the button on Sam's bed to raise him up to a reclining position. "Your doctor has placed you on a liquid diet for this morning so I'm afraid you've only got some hot tea, a carton of apple juice, and some plain jello for breakfast."

"Thanks" Sam replied as he fingered the carton of apple juice with disinterest not wanting to be rude.

"Your quite welcome sir" Lily replied with a wink and then walked out of the room to deliver the next breakfast tray.

Sam picked up his spoon and started pushing the jello around in the bowl. He really didn't feel like eating or drinking anything and his mind began to wonder. It still hurt him to know that Dean had always considered him an inconvenience or hindrance growing up when he had always looked up to his brother as a hero. He honestly thought Dean had enjoyed having him around but apparently he was wrong. Dean only spent time with him because his dad had ordered him to do it, and not because he wanted to. He sighed as he picked up a bite of lime green jello with his spoon and then dropped it into the bowl once again.

"Sammy, you alright kiddo?" Bobby questioned as he watched Sam playing with his breakfast. He didn't like the disheartened look that had just crossed Sammy's face and wondered what was going through his mind.

"M'fine" Sam replied automatically without looking up at the man who had become like an uncle to him. Even though Bobby was in the room with him, he still felt loneliness closing in on him from all sides knowing that Dean no longer cared about him. He wondered where he would go and what he would do after he got out of the hospital. Everything that had ever meant anything to him was now gone and he couldn't go back to Stanford since it would bring back too many bad memories of Jess. He allowed a single tear to fall as he realized he was destined to be alone for the rest of his life.

"You don't look fine to me tiger" Bobby replied as he came over and sat on the edge of the bed beside Sam and placed a hand on his knee. "Talk to me kid, what's eating at ya?"

"Nothing, I'm just tired" Sam replied as he rolled over to face away from Bobby and pretended to go to sleep praying that Bobby would leave him alone.

"Okay kiddo, you get some rest, but we're gonna talk later and get things out in the open" Bobby informed him as he carded his fingers through Sammy's hair before returning to the reclining chair that he had slept on to keep a watch over Sammy.

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By the time that Dean arrived in the room approximately ninety minutes later, Sam had indeed fallen back to sleep. He was softly snoring when Dean sidled up to his bed and watched him intently for a few minutes as he slept. Dean noticed the dried tear track on his face and felt his heart ache just a little bit more knowing that it was probably him that had put it there. He scrubbed a hand through his short dark blonde hair and sighed deeply. "I'm so sorry tiger" he whispered as he reached out to brush his thumb along Sam's cheek. "I swear to you I'll make things right again between us, just you wait and see."

"I don't doubt that for a minute since you inherited your daddy's Winchester stubbornness" Bobby said. "You got something in there for me too boy?" he asked as he pointed to the Denny's takeout bag. He was beyond hungry since he was used to eating breakfast by six in the morning, but he didn't want to leave Sammy alone to go get some.

"Hope sausage and egg biscuits are okay" Dean said as he reached in to the bag to pull out two of the biscuits for Bobby and two for himself before also handing a cup of coffee over to Bobby.

Sounds wonderful" Bobby replied as he quickly unwrapped one of the biscuits and took a huge bite out of it. "I'm starving."

As they sat eating, Dean thought about the angel that had saved Sammy and the words that it had said. "Hey Bobby, mind if I ask you a question?" Dean asked hesitantly.

"Nah, what's on your mind sport?"

"I was just thinking about what Hamied said too Sammy, you know about him having '_much left to do on this earth.' _What do you think the angel meant by that?"

"Well Dean, I don't rightly know. But maybe it means that Sam's got a special destiny ahead of him after this demon war is over. I know your daddy was worried about Sam turning evil when he died because of that damned yellow eyed demon having some kind of connection with him, but just maybe Sam is the one who will finally rid this world of demons and their destructive ways. Maybe God has a special plan for him" Bobby replied in answer to the question. I choose to believe he was given those visions for a reason and that eventually, they'll provide the knowledge we need to seal the demons in the pits of hell forever more."

"I know in my heart that dad was wrong when he said Sammy might turn evil. Hell Bobby, there isn't an evil bone in that kid's body. And now that he's actually been touched by an angel, I think you're right. Sam is going to be the deciding factor in this war and I'm going to make sure he doesn't fall!" Dean stated with conviction.

"I'm right there with you Dean, you know I'll always be there for you boys" Bobby stated with a gleam in his eyes.

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A few hours later, Sam had finally been taken out of the ICU and moved to a regular room. He had woken up to find Bobby gone and Dean in the room sitting by his bed. Still angry with his brother, he refused to acknowledge that Dean was even there. He pointedly refuse to answer anything Dean said to him and after what seemed like the fiftieth time of Dean asking if he needed anything, Sam finally lost his temper. "Will you just get the hell out of here and never come back. I'm sick to death of hearing your damn mouth running all the time like a leaky faucet."

"No, I won't leave until you tell me what the hell is wrong with you Sammy and why your trying to push me away."

"Stop acting like you care Dean. You don't give a shit about me and you never have. All these years you just pretended that you wanted to spend time with me when the only damn reason you stuck around was because dad ordered you too and you know it" Sam snarled with tears glistening in his eyes

"That's not true Sammy. Yeah, dad always told me to watch out for you, but I did it because that's what I wanted to do and not because dad told me to."

"You're a liar Dean, you've been lying to me my whole life so why should I believe you now? Why else would you have said that you gave up your life for me with such hatred in your voice huh?"

"Because I was damned stupid and I was pissed off and I wanted to hurt you for forcing Christmas on me at the time Sammy that's why. I said the first thing that came to my mind that I knew would hurt you and I'll regret that for the rest of my life. I love you Sammy and I have NEVER ONCE considered you a burden."

"Why should I believe you Dean?" Sam asked apathetically.

"Just think about it Sam. Would I have talked dad into letting you join the soccer team at school when you were twelve knowing that I would have to be the one to get you to all of your games if I thought you were a burden? Would I have saved every spare cent I made shoveling snow out of driveways in the winter time so I could make sure that you had a few gifts under the tree that I had to go out and scrounge up at Christmas time myself if you didn't mean the world to me? And what about those days that I cooked something for you to eat claiming that I wasn't hungry so that you would at least have something to fill your stomach, does that sound like somebody who doesn't care to you little brother?" Dean watched as warring emotions crossed his brothers face hoping that he finally had gotten through to him.

"Dean I don't know what…God my head is so mixed up right now" Sam gasped as he raised his palms to cover his face and began to sob. He didn't know what to think or what to believe.

"S'okay Sammy, I've got you" Dean said as he sat down on the bed and pulled his baby brother into his arms. "Everything's going to be alright tiger, everything is going to be just fine."

**TBC**


	7. Chapter 7

**Still, Still, Still --A Christmas to Remember Ch. 7**

**Disclaimer: **Still don't own them and still not making a profit. I also don't own the lyrics to the Christmas song Still, Still, Still!

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**Previously: **_"S'okay Sammy, I've got you" Dean said as he sat down on the bed and pulled his baby brother into his arms. "Everything's going to be alright tiger, everything is going to be just fine."_

Dean couldn't remember ever being happier in his life than he was at this very moment. Sam was finally being released after having spent almost a week in the hospital recovering from the effects of the severe electrical shock he had sustained to his body. And even though things were still strained between him and his brother, Sammy had finally allowed him inside that barrier he had erected around himself and accepted the comfort that Dean was so willing to give. Of course Dean wasn't fooling himself, he knew that this was just the beginning, that he still had a lot of work to do if he was going to rebuild that brotherly bond with Sam once again.

His first attempt at rebuilding that bond would be to give his brother the Christmas he deserved. He had went into town to pick up three turkey dinners with all the trimmings and a few presents for his brother while Bobby went to the hospital to pick Sammy up. Those presents were now wrapped and under the tree along with the ones that Bobby had already placed there before this whole mess had begun. Now he just had to wait for Sammy to get home so that they could all spend a belated Christmas together.

The thought had no sooner entered his head when he heard the sound of Bobby's old Ford pickup pulling into the yard. He looked out the widow to see Bobby get out of the driver's side of the vehicle and walk around to help Sammy. He wished he had been the one to pick up his little brother but Sam had asked for Bobby to do it instead. Dean was hurt by it at first, but then he understood that Sam would be tense making an hour long drive with him when things weren't up to par yet between them. Not only that, but the doctor had told him that Sammy would still experience trouble with the neurons in his brain not functioning properly over the next few weeks so he would undoubtedly suffer mood swings. Knowing this, he braced himself to accept whatever reaction Sammy showed to his attempts at giving Sam a proper Christmas.

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As Sam made the drive home with Bobby, he worried about how tense things were going to be once they got back to Singer Salvage Yard. He couldn't help but remember the last time they had been there. Dean had went off on him and punched him in the face upon losing his temper when he had seen all the Christmas decorations. He knew Dean had felt betrayed by him, but he honestly didn't think he deserved to be on the receiving end of Dean's fist. He sighed as he wondered if he would have to sleep on the couch again. That couch was just not built to hold somebody of his height.

"Sammy, you alright son?" Bobby questioned immediately after hearing him sigh wondering if Sam needed to stop for a break. He knew the kid was still not feeling to well, but the doctors felt that he was doing well enough to be released.

"Yeah, I'm good Bobby, just a little nervous about going back to the salvage yard after what happened the last time I was there" Sam admitted as he unconsciously wrung his hands together.

"Things are gonna be okay kiddo. Dean knows what he did was wrong and he's doing his damnedest to make things right again tiger. Just give it some time, things will get better between you two. I can feel it in these old bones of mine."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. I just feel kind of uneasy around him sometimes you know. I'm not sure I'm ready to uh….would you mind sticking around for a while Bobby, just until things aren't so …"

"You can count on it tiger" Bobby informed Sam as he lay a comforting hand on his knee and squeezed it just a little. He wasn't about to let those two alone together until Sam was totally at ease with his brother once again. He knew a lot of Sam's anxiousness was coming from the fact that his head was still a little screwed up from the severe electrical shock to his system. Sammy would never be acting this way otherwise. He hoped that Dean would be ready to face an anxious brother upon their arrival.

As Bobby pulled up into the driveway, he said a silent prayer to John or whoever was listening to help the boys through the upcoming days. He couldn't stand seeing the distance that was between them now. Bobby pushed open his door and climbed out of the truck so he could walk around and help Sammy.

As they walked up to the porch with Bobby lightly supporting Sam, Dean walked out of the house to offer his help. As he did, he noticed that Sam looked at him with wary eyes and that he had started worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. _"Damn, he's still not totally comfortable with me yet" _he thought while plastering a smile on his face.

"Damn Sammy, it sure is good to see you out of the hospital dude" Dean said as he walked out to meet them. "You doing okay, you need any help?"

"Nah, were good" Bobby stated for Sammy as he kept one arm around Sam's shoulders while helping him up the front porch steps. He could see the hurt in Dean's eyes and felt sorry for the older brother. Dean had always been the one to help when Sammy was hurting and now he had to stand by and watch as another person took his place.

As Sam walked into the house, he gasped to see the Christmas decorations that adorned the place and the decorated evergreen tree that still stood in the corner. He was even more shocked as he noticed the presents that lay beneath the tree. The gifts had seemed to multiply in number since the last time they were at Bobby's. As he made his way over to the couch, he gave Bobby a questioning look.

"Don't look at me dude" Bobby said as he saw Sam's questioning gaze, I didn't have anything to do with this.

"No, it was all my idea. Merry late Christmas Sammy" Dean said with a smile as he took one of the glasses of eggnog off of the coffee table and attempted to hand it to his brother. He was surprised however to see a look of annoyance cross his brother's face.

"What the hell Dean?" Sam questioned unbelievingly. "Why the hell would you all of the sudden act so damned jolly when just a few short days ago you were pissed as hell at me?"

"Sammy please, I'm sorry. I never should have acted the way I did earlier. I was too focused on my own pain that I couldn't see that you were hurting too and just trying to make things a little bit better."

"And that's supposed to make it better Dean? I'm supposed to understand that it's okay when you want to do things but that I better damned well ask first or risk getting punched again, that it's okay to celebrate the holiday now because you say it is?"

"God Sammy no, that's not what I am trying to do here. This is my way of trying to apologize to you little brother, my way of trying to say that I'm sorry" Dean looked with pleading eyes at his baby brother hoping he would understand the meaning behind what he had tried to do.

"Whatever Dean" Sam said in dismay as he placed his head in his hands. He was starting to get a nasty headache. Sam was surprised to feel a hand on his shoulder a moment later and looked up to see Bobby holding two white pills out to him.

"Take these kiddo, they'll help you to feel better" Bobby said as he gave Sammy some of the pain medicine that the doctor had prescribed for him. Sam smiled up at him gratefully as he swallowed the two pills and then washed them down with the eggnog. He felt Bobby thrust a pillow beside him on the couch and then lay down to relax his aching body. It only took fifteen short minutes before the pills had kicked in and he was sleeping in a drug induced sleep.

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As Sam slept on the couch, Dean sat talking quietly with Bobby in the kitchen. Dean had become depressed over Sam's reaction to celebrating Christmas and felt that he had let his brother down once again.

"How could I have been so stupid Bobby? I should have realized how Sammy would feel about celebrating after what I did. I should have known better than try to push this on him so soon. Damn it, am I ever going to stop hurting him all the damned time?"

"Dean stop blaming yourself for the way Sammy reacted. He's just stressed right now as well as a little mixed up with his emotions. Give him a chance to adjust, I'm sure he'll appreciate what you're trying to do."

"You think so Bobby? I mean I could go in there and remove the presents and we could just pretend nothing happened. I don't want to upset him anymore."

"Let's just wait and see how he's doing when he wakes up. We'll take our cue from there" Bobby stated as he poured him and Dean a cup of steaming black coffee.

For the next three hours, Bobby and Dean discussed the yellow eyed demon and everything they knew about the son of a bitch that had destroyed the Winchester's lives. They were determined to find a way to finish the demon off once and for all so that the boys could get on with their lives without the shadow of the demon hanging over every thing they did. As they discussed different spells and weapons that might work, they heard the sound of Sam's moaning in the living room and went to check on their youngest.

"Hey tiger, you feeling better?" Dean questioned with a hopeful gaze towards his brother.

"Yeah, M'fine" Sam mumbled as he wiped the sleep from his eyes. "I'm feeling kinda hungry though."

"Well, I went to town early and bought three turkey dinners with all the trimmings if you're up to it, but if you'd rather not, I can cook us up some hotdogs or something" Dean offered.

"Turkey sounds good" Sam replied with a smile as he pushed himself up off the couch. "I'll just go wash up while you're getting it ready."

Dean beamed with happiness as he rushed off towards the kitchen to warm up the dinners. At least he had did something right today. As they sat down to the meal, Dean could tell that Sammy's mood had definitely changed for the better. His brother was actually smiling and making small talk about the Christmas decorations that bedecked the kitchen walls raising his hopes that Sam would be willing to open presents later on.

After they had finished dinner and cleaned up the kitchen, the Winchesters and Bobby carried their coffee into the living room to watch the Sunday football game that was playing on the television. As Sam noticed the presents under the tree once again, he felt a little remorse at the way he had acted earlier not knowing what had gotten into him and made him so angry.

"So, uh, anything under that tree for me?" Sam asked as he looked at Dean and Bobby with sparkling eyes.

"Sure there is bitch" Dean said with a smile so brilliant that it lit up the whole house.

He walked over towards the tree and pulled out the few presents he had wrapped wanting Sammy to open them first. Picking up a small one wrapped in gold paper and a silver bow, he laid it into his brother's hands. "I want you to open this one first" Dean said with a gleam in his eyes.

As Sam opened the present, he was surprised to see a small plastic replica of a toy bridge. "That Sammy is my promise to you to bridge the gap that has been between us since Dad died. I swear to you that I'm going to do everything I can until that bond between us is solid once again" Dean informed his baby brother.

The next present he handed to Sam was wrapped in red and green foil paper with a silver bow on top. When Sam opened it, he found a squishy stress ball. "That one Sammy is my promise to never strike out at you again in anger. I know I have a hot temper at times and that I have a habit of taking it out on whoever is closest to me. I swear to you I will do my damnedest to make sure that I never ever hit you in anger again baby brother" Dean said with tears flowing down his cheeks.

"Th-That means a lot Dean, thanks" Sam replied with a few tears running down his own cheeks.

The last present Dean handed him was a small square package wrapped in blue. When Sam opened it, he was shocked to find a silver money clip with the letters JW engraved into it. "Dean I can't take this, I know how much it means to you man" Sam said as he tried to hand over his dad's favorite money clip, the one that Mary had given to him for his last birthday before she had been killed.

"I want you to have it Sammy. He was your dad too and I know you loved him just as much as I did. Dad would want you to have it too kiddo."

Sam was too choked up to speak as he held the money clip tightly in his grasp. Maybe, just maybe things were going to get better again.

**TBC **_**The next chapter will be the epilogue to this story.**_


	8. Chapter 8

**Still, Still, Still! A Christmas to Remember Ch. 8 the Epilogue**

**Disclaimer: **Still don't own them and still not making a profit. I also don't own the lyrics to the Christmas song Still, Still, Still!

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**Previously: **_Sam was too choked up to speak as he held his father's money clip tightly in his grasp. Maybe, just maybe, things were going to get better again._

Bobby watched in amazement at the gifts that Dean had given to Sammy. He was astounded by the thought and emotions that Dean had put behind each gift to his brother. The gifts came from the heart and showed Dean's determination in getting back his little brother's love. It somehow made the gifts he had gotten for the boys insignificant in a way---but they would still be given with love.

"Okay, enough with the chick flick moment" Bobby said as he watched Sam reach out and hug his brother for the heart felt gifts. "I've kinda got something for you boys too. Bobby reached under the tree and brought out two small identically wrapped boxes in green foil with red bows attached. "It's not much, but I just wanted you boys to know that I was thinking about ya and that you mean….ah hell, just open the presents."

The boys opened their boxes to find a small quincunx charm made of silver. The quincunx, considered a hoodoo symbol, is simply the arrangement of five units that resembled the five spot on a piece of dice and it is a powerful charm used to ward off enemies.

"Wow Bobby, these are great, thanks" Dean stated as he pulled the charm out of the box and looked at it closely. "I always knew you loved us old man!"

"Shuddup Dean" Bobby stated as he slapped him up alongside his head. "And yeah, I do love ya and I ain't ashamed to admit it so there."

"You know we love you too right Bobby. You've always been there for us when we needed you and we'll never forget that" Sam said with his eyes glistening at the older hunter.

"And I'll always be there for you any time you need me tiger, all you have to do is call" Bobby said as he wrapped a hand around Sammy's neck and pulled him in for a bear hug which Sammy returned affectionately.

"We know Bobby. Oh by the way, we've got something for you too" Sam said as he asked Dean to go get his duffle bag for him. Once Dean returned with it, he reached in and pulled out two wrapped boxes. As Bobby opened up the first, he found a picture that had been taken of him and the boys when they were much younger and fishing off of a dock in a silver frame with the word family boldly etched across the top.

"This is perfect, thanks" Bobby stated as he held the picture close to his heart. It brought back cherished memories of the few times in between hunts when John and the boys had visited and they were able to relax and actually enjoy themselves."

As he opened the other box, his eyes twinkled with merriment as he pulled out a black t-shirt emblazoned with the words _Hunters Pack More Firepower! _"Damn straight we pack more firepower he said with a smirk and an evil smile."

""Aw jeez Bobby, don't even make me think about you doing something like that" Dean said as he pretended to gag and vomit.

"Hey, I ain't dead yet boy. I still have some life left in this body of mine" Bobby replied laughing.

Dean just laughed and shook his head at the antics of the older hunter. He never could get one up on Bobby since he was just too damned good with his witty comebacks. "Hey, I just realized it's New Years Eve" Dean informed the others as he looked over towards the calendar on the wall. "What do you say we go out and celebrate?"

"I'm kind of wiped out Dean. I don't think I'm up to going to a bar and partying the new year in, but you and Bobby can go." Sam replied with a yawn.

"Nah, wouldn't be the same without you bitch. I'll stay here and we can just ring in the new year quietly watching the ball drop on Times Square."

"Dean, I don't want you miss out on all the fun because of me. Go out and have a good time. I'll probably just sleep in the new year anyway" Sam said feeling bad for basically raining on Dean's parade so to speak.

"Sammy, I wouldn't be able to have any fun if you weren't by my side. I'd be too busy worrying about you dude. I'm staying."

"Me too" Bobby replied. "I can't think of a better way than to ring in the new year than with you boys by my side and drinking a little sparkling water."

'What the hell Bobby? I though we'd toast in the new year with champagne or at least a beer" Dean stated incredulously.

"Not this year Dean-O. Sammy boy is on medication and pain pills and alcohol don't mix."

"Yeah, you're right, sparkling water it is then."

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As Bobby prepared their evening meal of barbeque chicken, fried potatoes and corn on the cob, he had Dean run into town to get some party hats and horns for the new year while Sammy went up to their room to get some sleep. The kid was obviously wiped out and if he didn't rest now, he would never be able to stay awake to bring in the new year.

While he cooked, Bobby thought about how tough the past year had been on the boys. Not only had John died, but Sammy was hit with his painful visions and lost the love of his life to the same demon that took his mother. He could only hope this new year would hold better things for the boys that he was coming to think of as his own. He couldn't help but see how things were going to be stressful for them as they faced the life of hunting without their daddy by their side. Feeling just a little nostalgic, he looked up toward the ceiling and said "I swear to you John, I'll watch over those boys as if they were my own and I'll do everything within my power to protect them from the war that's coming."

Approximately an hour later, Bobby sent Dean to wake up Sammy while he took care of setting the table for their dinner. The guys all sat down for a quiet dinner and then moved to the living room where Bobby turned on the television so they could watch the idjits in Time Square ringing in the new year. It astounded Bobby to think that so many people would want to crowd into an area where they were practically smashed together like pancakes just so the could see the ball drop. Didn't they know it would be much more comfortable not to mention warm to watch it happen from their own living rooms.

"Okay here we go, get your hats on and your kazoo's ready" Dean said as they began to count down.

"Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six. Five, Four. Three, Two. One. Happy New Year" they all shouted as they blew their kazoo's and threw confetti into the air. Dean, Sam, and Bobby all hugged each other and shook hands as the wished each other a safe, happy and above all healthy new year.

Sam's eyes glowed as he watched the festivities going on in Times Square along with their own small celebration at Bobby's house. For once, he really was looking forward to the new year and what it would bring with his brother and Bobby by his side.

**THE END Sorry for the short chapter but I have plans with my family to ring in the New Year. I wish you all the happiness in the coming year and that you also have a Happy, Healthy, and Safe New year!!!!!!**


End file.
